[ dextera did not want this question, but he also isn’t very good at lying. he could pretend the message system failed and that he didn’t see what akira asked, but that feels somewhat cruel—he just isn’t sure what to say. ]
[ ryo would absolutely prefer that dextera not say anything. even if he doesn’t realize why he did it, or can’t acknowledge it, he surely has the presence of self to understand that most people don’t treat even their dearest friend, when platonic, with such tender and loving affection. ]
Don’t you think that’s a strange thing to hallucinate?
[ ryo won’t like it. it’s like a litany in his head, reminding him that he’s doing something wrong by going behind ryo’s back—but he’s mad at ryo, and maybe this is a petty revenge of a kind.
maybe, however, he’s trying to help. when he thinks akira might be arriving, he’s down to the first floor, and he opens the door. ]
[Akira hangs in the doorway, hands in his pockets and a frown on his face. Dextera must be serious about this if he wanted to talk in person, leaving him feeling apprehensive-- even if it gets him closer to the answers he wants.]
Hey. [He gives him a once over, checking to see if he's mostly recovered from the effects of the grimoire.]
[ it does feel strange, having akira here now, knowing everything… knowing more than ryo himself knows, honestly. he won’t say all that there is to say, but it’s only right to gently steer akira in the right direction. especially if those tender moments he shared with pyra are any indication of his current feelings. ]
[Akira steps inside, patting him on the arm, wanting to ease a little of the obvious awkwardness Dextera feels. They're friends, after all, and Akira does feel a little bad, dragging him into the middle of this.]
[ dextera leads him into the house, to a place where they can sit—the “place” is just the closest thing this home has to a living room, and it’s on the floor, but there aren’t many people around in this house anymore. they aren’t in danger of running into someone that would care about this gossip.
once they’re settled, dextera mulls over his words. ]
[ dextera nods. both observations are true—ryo lied, and he doesn’t like to talk about his feelings. in this case, however, based on all else dextera knows, it’s possible that ryo doesn’t even realize consciously what his feelings are.
it makes it easier, in a strange way, to forgive him for being cruel. ]
I know… I know that. Do you remember when the town showed all our hearts?
[Akira's eyes widen briefly, and he nods. He hasn't forgotten what he learned about Dextera from seeing his heart, and even now the memory saddens him.]
[ another nod. he’s not yet sure how he wants to phrase this, but he speaks patiently and strangely even, for someone like him. maybe it’s part of god, speaking through him, wanting to offer comfort to people who need it most. ]
…did you see Ryo’s?
[ maybe ryo kept out of akira’s way, knowing all that was going on. ]
[Akira's almost afraid to hear the answer. He knows there's a darkness in Ryo's heart, the kind that can kill innocents or tip the world into war, the kind which once made Akira ask whether he had human blood in his veins at all. But Ryo has also managed to temper that destructive urge with -- something else, even if he's never understood what.]
[ dextera doesn’t want to give everything away. some of what he saw truly are ryo’s secrets and things for ryo alone to reckon with, but so much of it involved akira that it would be wrong to hide it from him now. he shakes his head. ]
I can’t describe it all. It’s hard to say what some of it meant, but…
[ that room, filled with akira. the paintings on the walls. even ryo himself couldn’t see the evidence of his own feelings, which makes dextera’s heart ache for him now. ]
[ akira’s smile helps shake dextera from his increasingly somber thoughts about ryo and all that they’ve been through, and when he looks up, over at akira, there’s a little light in his eyes that had been starting to dim at the thought of it all. for a moment, to dextera, it seemed quite hopeless. ]
I don’t think he would appreciate me saying much… but I guess he wouldn’t appreciate any of this.
[ he exhales, running his fingers along the old flooring. ]
[ just as akira is unsurprised by the description, dextera is unsurprised at his mild reaction. still, he wonders if it’s just a sign of how little akira knows. ]
I think that’s what Ryo would say, too.
[ dextera touches his own wrist, where the bracelet he gave to guren used to hang. it’s still bare, since guren left. ]
…do you think that’s all there is to it? That you’re best friends?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
#D20000 | early april
thanks again for helping me out before. i hope you're feeling better now
sorry to bring it up again, but there's something i want to ask about what happened in the forest
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Of course.
What is it?
[ he feels better by now, but the memories of that day make him somber—as they would anyone. ]
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[He's not sure why Ryo would lie about it, but he figures he should get a second opinion, just in case.]
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Did Ryo say something?
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now i don't know what to think
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Don’t you think that’s a strange thing to hallucinate?
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did you see anything?
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[Better than Dextera coming to Akira's now that he lives with Ryo, for obvious reasons.]
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maybe, however, he’s trying to help. when he thinks akira might be arriving, he’s down to the first floor, and he opens the door. ]
Akira.
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Hey. [He gives him a once over, checking to see if he's mostly recovered from the effects of the grimoire.]
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…
[ dextera nods awkwardly, rubbing his arm. ]
Hello. You can… come in.
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[Akira steps inside, patting him on the arm, wanting to ease a little of the obvious awkwardness Dextera feels. They're friends, after all, and Akira does feel a little bad, dragging him into the middle of this.]
What did you want to tell me?
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[ dextera leads him into the house, to a place where they can sit—the “place” is just the closest thing this home has to a living room, and it’s on the floor, but there aren’t many people around in this house anymore. they aren’t in danger of running into someone that would care about this gossip.
once they’re settled, dextera mulls over his words. ]
…Ryo did… kiss you. I saw it.
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So he did lie. [It wouldn't be the first time and it won't be the last, though for some reason this stings in particular.]
If he was trying to make me feel better, or if he did it because he was sad, it's okay. But he never wants to show how he feels.
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it makes it easier, in a strange way, to forgive him for being cruel. ]
I know… I know that. Do you remember when the town showed all our hearts?
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I remember.
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…did you see Ryo’s?
[ maybe ryo kept out of akira’s way, knowing all that was going on. ]
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[Akira's almost afraid to hear the answer. He knows there's a darkness in Ryo's heart, the kind that can kill innocents or tip the world into war, the kind which once made Akira ask whether he had human blood in his veins at all. But Ryo has also managed to temper that destructive urge with -- something else, even if he's never understood what.]
What did you see?
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[ dextera doesn’t want to give everything away. some of what he saw truly are ryo’s secrets and things for ryo alone to reckon with, but so much of it involved akira that it would be wrong to hide it from him now. he shakes his head. ]
I can’t describe it all. It’s hard to say what some of it meant, but…
[ that room, filled with akira. the paintings on the walls. even ryo himself couldn’t see the evidence of his own feelings, which makes dextera’s heart ache for him now. ]
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[Akira smiles, then. That was a more positive response than he'd expected, and to hear there's beauty inside Ryo makes him happy.]
Can you tell me a little? If some of it is too personal, you don't have to.
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I don’t think he would appreciate me saying much… but I guess he wouldn’t appreciate any of this.
[ he exhales, running his fingers along the old flooring. ]
He had a lot of pictures of you.
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Well, we're best friends. Ryo doesn't have a lot of people in his life he can count on.
[So of course Akira would be an important part of that, just as Akira's own heart had been filled with the friends and family he treasured most.]
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I think that’s what Ryo would say, too.
[ dextera touches his own wrist, where the bracelet he gave to guren used to hang. it’s still bare, since guren left. ]
…do you think that’s all there is to it? That you’re best friends?
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I guess things back home made it a little more complicated... But I want to give him a second chance. Is that what you mean?
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