[ dextera has a cat in his lap and an array of foods that are begging to be eaten, and for a moment, he doesn’t even know where to begin. he crunches through a bone with the impressive and possibly inhuman strength of his jaw, swallows it, and leans forward to examine the food while trying to still hold pennyworth. ]
…
[ he’s gonna use his fingers. sorry.
it’s obvious that he’s going for it with his fingers, too, because he reaches out like he’s going to play football or something, stopping just above the warm, steaming casserole. ]
What about you?
i just saw i typed dextera infiltrated dextera's lap and laughed for ten minutes
[Uh, yeah. The bone eating? Crazy shit. But Damian at least has the decency not to ridicule it, not knowing what he does of Dextera so far. He thinks it must be something innate, something a part of what Dextera is as a being. As long as the bones are scraps and not, like... ripped out of people. It's fine.]
I'll eat with you. It's Thanksgiving after all.
[So he does, whether or not Dextera decides to start trying things. He doesn't get any of the meat, but he does slide the rest of the vegetables and fruit and gravy onto his own plate and returns to have a seat beside Dextera and Pennyworth.]
Pennyworth could have made a feast for the entire town more than likely. [It sounds both fond and mournful. As if he misses the man.] This will have to do.
[ dextera did eat a lot of the skeletons that came around last month, but… listen, it was like a community service. he was cleaning up the town, especially once the bones all randomly turned a dry-blood red.
for now, though, as soon as he has a proper array in front of him, he starts to eat, one hand shoveling food into his mouth like someone who has forgotten all sense of grace and etiquette, and the other is, surprisingly efficiently, petting the cat just hard enough that he can never seem to escape from dextera’s ministrations onto the table to eat. dextera has learned a knack for this kind of thing, with leliel.
Yes. Alfred Pennyworth, the original. [Without saying anything against it, Damian watches Dextera eat. He can't and won't call it savagery, not when he's aware plenty of cultures eat with their fingers. All he does it make sure Dextera has a scrap of cloth to use as a napkin.] If this one could cook much less hold something without an opposable thumb, I would be surprised.
[The Pennyworth here, in question, very slowly puts a gently paw onto the edge of the table. Testing. Just very lightly, right there with it's little arrow-shaped foot. Pennyworth glances up at Dextera as if to see whether Dextera will scold him not.]
[ dextera looks down at the cat once he notices the paw, and although he doesn’t scold him, he does just… offer up one finger that still has a little food on it for the cat to consume. you don’t need to go on the table, child. dextera is a willing servant.
he also doesn’t have a very good grasp of what animals should and should not do at the table, or anything like that. he’s prone to spoiling, which is how leliel got as pleasantly plump as she is. ]
It's more a matter of capability than... [But he doesn't finish. It feels wrong, in the face of Dextera, to talk about what would be considered a handicap.
He's trying to be reasonable, but he already knows how many people would not suffer his logic when they optimistically argue that anyone is absolutely capable of anything so long as there's an attempt, practice.] Nevermind.
When he's able to cook, I'll invite you over again for the meal. [Pushy, Pennyworth slaps one paw gently around Dextera's wrist to keep the hand from fleeing, and then the bristled tongue goes to work on the finger. Damian snorts.] We can make him some chef's whites. A toque blanche.
Just don't be surprised if there are only rat innards, and feathered drumsticks, and mole tails to eat. [There's a tiny, almost mischievous grin at this, like he's waiting for Dextera to be grossed out by the description. (The guy who eats bones and hearts, sure.)] If you even get to have any. He'll probably eat it all first.
[ good try, damian, but dextera doesn’t realize he was being teased. technically, he’s never had rat either, but he’s had things that are more similar to rats than they are to moles. gross. all of it, really, is gross.
that comment will hopefully slip by unnoticed, however, as damian presses forward to ask him about the quality of the food—much more than gross pieces of animals that aren’t entirely meant for consumption in the first place, everything damian has prepared is hot and delicious, not to mention made with fondness, if not love.
dextera appreciates it, his expression warming as pennyworth licks away. he nods. ]
[Wow. (unsure) for real. Even if Damian lets that statement go, he won't forget the implication Dextera has eaten rat and maybe feathers attached to a bird. Bones. Look, Dextera told him a bit about the desolate future Dextera is a part of--it's fine?
Damian knows, sometimes, things have to be done to survive. He doesn't fault Dextera for an extremely weird diet. He'll draw the line at horny on main with God and Satan, however.]
It's sufficient. [Damian is less modest and more accepting no one can make food as good as Alfred Pennyworth. Except maybe Ignis?] Whatever's left, you can take to Ichinose, I suppose. [A small, suffering sigh.]
[ dextera can’t help himself. when damian sighs like that, a quiet laugh slips from his mouth, and he covers it quickly with another bite of the veggies on display. he doesn’t completely understand the strange rivalry that damian has with guren, but it’s endearing, in a way.
it feels normal, or right, or something. ]
He’s picky. [ although his hands are necessarily toneless, there’s a fond look on his face—then, he frowns, his best impression of guren at his most stern. ] ‘I don’t eat food from brats.’
[ dextera can’t imitate guren’s voice, either, but he does sign a little harder, more forceful. he’s doing his best. ]
[The intention wasn't for Dextera to laugh--he's serious, alright--but he seems pleased he got the reaction anyway.
Dramatically, purposefully, he rolls his eyes at the imitation, mostly because it's very like Guren even with the lack of verbal tone and the softness of Dextera's face.] Tt. Jokes on him.
He ate my strawberry tarts. So I guess he does eat food from brats.
[Damian smiles both smugly and, yeah, maybe somewhat fondly. He gives Guren a very tough time with poor Dextera smashed between their rivalry, but the two of them do mean a great deal to him anyway.]
dextera is a little embarrassed at his own impersonation of guren, even though damian made no commentary on it—his cheeks a little pinker for it, and so he moves on in the conversation. speaking of guren, and all this food, if anyone knows how to make a very important thing, it would be damian, wouldn’t it? ]
…do you know how to make cola?
[ curry seems possible, these days, but dextera has no idea where to even begin with soda. ]
[At this, Damian pauses to peer at Dextera. He seems... intrigued and confused all at once.] Cola? Mm. [It's not a terribly odd request, but maybe for Dextera it's somewhat strange.]
I know how to make it. The only part which would give us trouble would be the carbonation, the one thing that makes a soda. Otherwise, we'd only need sugar or honey syrup and some fruit.
pennyworth has moved on from licking the food off dextera’s fingers to licking the salt off his skin, which is fine. he may just be stuck in an endless loop of licking, as cats are prone to. ]
He [ guren, that is ] likes it.
[ and it would certainly be more effective if he hadn’t said that, but listen. dextera’s heart is pure. ]
[Ah. Dextera doesn't have to say, but Damian gets it. Now. He's been updated on Guren and Dextera's relationship, and though he tries not to think about it much like a child doesn't want to think about their parents, he can't deny it exists.
He knows who Dextera is talking about.] I see.
To work with what we have here, we would need... vinegar and baking soda. Bottles with caps of some kind. Tubing. We'd have to make our own seltzer contraption. It can be done if we have the ingredients.
[ dextera does manage to follow that, incredibly. the gaps in his knowledge are wide, but he did learn a lot over the years that have remained with him now. he just needs someone to jog his memory, a bit. ]
For the syrup and the flavor, yes. I'll have to check about the vinegar and baking soda. Strider or Scientia may have something or know someone who does if you wanted to ask personally.
[He would say they could make a forum post, but he isn't sure Ichinose wouldn't be able to stumble upon it somehow before they're able to deliver the surprise.]
If another way comes up... something related to how the town functions, I'll let you know. [With a sigh, he tilts his head.] You should have told me months ago. I could have stolen one from the Cave.
[ the laugh sounds genuinely apologetic, for what it’s worth, and the slight movement of a result—more than his hand?—gets pennyworth to wriggle out of his lap to potentially plan a different angle of attack to get the leftovers. this is not the end. ]
I wished for some. With the coins. It’s not a big deal. Just something nice.
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…
[ he’s gonna use his fingers. sorry.
it’s obvious that he’s going for it with his fingers, too, because he reaches out like he’s going to play football or something, stopping just above the warm, steaming casserole. ]
What about you?
i just saw i typed dextera infiltrated dextera's lap and laughed for ten minutes
I'll eat with you. It's Thanksgiving after all.
[So he does, whether or not Dextera decides to start trying things. He doesn't get any of the meat, but he does slide the rest of the vegetables and fruit and gravy onto his own plate and returns to have a seat beside Dextera and Pennyworth.]
Pennyworth could have made a feast for the entire town more than likely. [It sounds both fond and mournful. As if he misses the man.] This will have to do.
i really enjoyed it honestly
for now, though, as soon as he has a proper array in front of him, he starts to eat, one hand shoveling food into his mouth like someone who has forgotten all sense of grace and etiquette, and the other is, surprisingly efficiently, petting the cat just hard enough that he can never seem to escape from dextera’s ministrations onto the table to eat. dextera has learned a knack for this kind of thing, with leliel.
he licks off his fingers. ]
Your butler? [ not the cat. he thinks. ]
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[The Pennyworth here, in question, very slowly puts a gently paw onto the edge of the table. Testing. Just very lightly, right there with it's little arrow-shaped foot. Pennyworth glances up at Dextera as if to see whether Dextera will scold him not.]
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[ dextera looks down at the cat once he notices the paw, and although he doesn’t scold him, he does just… offer up one finger that still has a little food on it for the cat to consume. you don’t need to go on the table, child. dextera is a willing servant.
he also doesn’t have a very good grasp of what animals should and should not do at the table, or anything like that. he’s prone to spoiling, which is how leliel got as pleasantly plump as she is. ]
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He's trying to be reasonable, but he already knows how many people would not suffer his logic when they optimistically argue that anyone is absolutely capable of anything so long as there's an attempt, practice.] Nevermind.
When he's able to cook, I'll invite you over again for the meal. [Pushy, Pennyworth slaps one paw gently around Dextera's wrist to keep the hand from fleeing, and then the bristled tongue goes to work on the finger. Damian snorts.] We can make him some chef's whites. A toque blanche.
Just don't be surprised if there are only rat innards, and feathered drumsticks, and mole tails to eat. [There's a tiny, almost mischievous grin at this, like he's waiting for Dextera to be grossed out by the description. (The guy who eats bones and hearts, sure.)] If you even get to have any. He'll probably eat it all first.
Is it good?
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[ good try, damian, but dextera doesn’t realize he was being teased. technically, he’s never had rat either, but he’s had things that are more similar to rats than they are to moles. gross. all of it, really, is gross.
that comment will hopefully slip by unnoticed, however, as damian presses forward to ask him about the quality of the food—much more than gross pieces of animals that aren’t entirely meant for consumption in the first place, everything damian has prepared is hot and delicious, not to mention made with fondness, if not love.
dextera appreciates it, his expression warming as pennyworth licks away. he nods. ]
It’s incredible.
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Damian knows, sometimes, things have to be done to survive. He doesn't fault Dextera for an extremely weird diet. He'll draw the line at horny on main with God and Satan, however.]
It's sufficient. [Damian is less modest and more accepting no one can make food as good as Alfred Pennyworth. Except maybe Ignis?] Whatever's left, you can take to Ichinose, I suppose. [A small, suffering sigh.]
If you can even manage to get him to eat it.
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[ dextera can’t help himself. when damian sighs like that, a quiet laugh slips from his mouth, and he covers it quickly with another bite of the veggies on display. he doesn’t completely understand the strange rivalry that damian has with guren, but it’s endearing, in a way.
it feels normal, or right, or something. ]
He’s picky. [ although his hands are necessarily toneless, there’s a fond look on his face—then, he frowns, his best impression of guren at his most stern. ] ‘I don’t eat food from brats.’
[ dextera can’t imitate guren’s voice, either, but he does sign a little harder, more forceful. he’s doing his best. ]
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Dramatically, purposefully, he rolls his eyes at the imitation, mostly because it's very like Guren even with the lack of verbal tone and the softness of Dextera's face.] Tt. Jokes on him.
He ate my strawberry tarts. So I guess he does eat food from brats.
[Damian smiles both smugly and, yeah, maybe somewhat fondly. He gives Guren a very tough time with poor Dextera smashed between their rivalry, but the two of them do mean a great deal to him anyway.]
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dextera is a little embarrassed at his own impersonation of guren, even though damian made no commentary on it—his cheeks a little pinker for it, and so he moves on in the conversation. speaking of guren, and all this food, if anyone knows how to make a very important thing, it would be damian, wouldn’t it? ]
…do you know how to make cola?
[ curry seems possible, these days, but dextera has no idea where to even begin with soda. ]
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I know how to make it. The only part which would give us trouble would be the carbonation, the one thing that makes a soda. Otherwise, we'd only need sugar or honey syrup and some fruit.
Why? Do you want the cola, I mean.
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pennyworth has moved on from licking the food off dextera’s fingers to licking the salt off his skin, which is fine. he may just be stuck in an endless loop of licking, as cats are prone to. ]
He [ guren, that is ] likes it.
[ and it would certainly be more effective if he hadn’t said that, but listen. dextera’s heart is pure. ]
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He knows who Dextera is talking about.] I see.
To work with what we have here, we would need... vinegar and baking soda. Bottles with caps of some kind. Tubing. We'd have to make our own seltzer contraption. It can be done if we have the ingredients.
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Do we have the ingredients?
[ that’s the more important question. ]
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[He would say they could make a forum post, but he isn't sure Ichinose wouldn't be able to stumble upon it somehow before they're able to deliver the surprise.]
If another way comes up... something related to how the town functions, I'll let you know. [With a sigh, he tilts his head.] You should have told me months ago. I could have stolen one from the Cave.
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[ the laugh sounds genuinely apologetic, for what it’s worth, and the slight movement of a result—more than his hand?—gets pennyworth to wriggle out of his lap to potentially plan a different angle of attack to get the leftovers. this is not the end. ]
I wished for some. With the coins. It’s not a big deal. Just something nice.