[ guren’s punishment—is not to touch dextera? that seems like such a strange thing, such an odd punishment to lay on someone for giving into temptation, especially when dextera is happy to think everything guren does is justified. ]
...
[ this feels like a punishment for dextera, too, as he reaches out to try to place his hands against guren’s chest. he can’t. there’s no weight stopping him, but he can see the way guren is forced to move away from his hands by whatever reverse magnetism has been laid over him as a curse.
his brow furrows, as he’s troubled by the same thing—is this permanent? ]
[Guren gets it, meanwhile. It's the number one temptation he gives in to, after all. Not that he shares that. He sighs, and he can't even reach out to comfort Dextera, so he's at a loss. He's thinking.]
It'll be okay. [It's just... touch, right? But immediately, he's realizing just how much he's been using touch. With someone who can't speak, and with someone like Guren who can't use his words for his emotions, touch had been so easy. Now what?]
[ that may be true, but without touch, it’s as good as an illusion. he became spoiled, by this contact—and now he’s sad to have it taken away. it’s not fair. ]
...
[ dextera nods, but he’s only somewhat comforted by guren’s reassurance. they can’t sleep next to each other, like this. it should be the furthest worry from his mind, but it’s something that occurs to him anyway. ]
Try. [ he signs, stubbornly, but even he doesn’t seem to believe that trying is going to get them there. ]
He lifts his hand again, reaching with all of his might for Dextera's arm. Pushing, straining, and as he applies more strength and his feet dig in to the floor, curse marks even begin to creep along his cheek, all for nothing.
He grunts out at the effort, giving up when he's given it his all and catching his breath for a very short moment.]
I can't. I'll try every day, but I don't know when this is going to go away, if at all.
[ but it’s not fair. that’s all he can think—uncharacteristic of him, when he’s usually so quick to accept the things that happen to him. why did the town take this away? it’s not just guren’s punishment, like this, and the feather seems like a pity prize.
he tries to lean forward, to rest his head on guren’s chest, something habitual and mindless until he stumbles because there’s a space between them that shouldn’t exist. ]
...
[ his head still lowered, like he doesn’t want to see guren’s face after that misstep, he exhales. ]
[Oh no, that may be the saddest puppy Dex he's seen in his life, and he frowns for his own realistic wording.]
Hey...
[But his hand is trying to reach, and he realizes with a click of his tongue that it's not going to work, and drops it again. What can he do... A quick few more seconds of thinking, and he's reaching to his own chest, unbuttoning his jacket.]
[ dextera wants to completely close this distance between them, to be warm against guren’s chest, but he can’t do that for as long as this punishment has them locked apart. ]
...?
[ he does move closer, though, just enough that it’s obvious he listened, and he glances up at guren without lifting his head too much.
[ this, he genuinely didn’t expect, and he’s lifting his head properly now as some of the sadness in his eyes gives way to surprise instead—guren’s fancy military jacket! he does associate it inexorably with guren, for obvious reasons, and having it around his shoulders is thus a comfort.
he tightens it, and he nods, but... something...
he wants to give guren something too, but he doesn’t know what. it’s not right that guren should be the one to comfort him when this is, after all, guren’s punishment.
so once he’s sure the jacket is balanced on his shoulders, he unhooks one of the bright red bracelets around his wrists, and offers it out to guren urgently.
[...He doesn't expect that. So, they're both left stunned, he guesses, as his eyes widen and he can't stop himself. It's brief, at least, and then he's reaching to take that bracelet, bringing it close to himself, his fingertips just appreciating the surface of it, first.]
A trade, huh?
[He lets out a short laugh, rolling up his right sleeve just enough and then hooking it on. At least it's for his wrist, that fits fine. He rolls up his other sleeve just to match.]
It doesn't look as good on me. [Jokes will lighten anything]
[ dextera doesn’t exactly think that’s true. there’s something... pleasant, warm, about seeing guren wear something that belongs to him. it’s just a bracelet, but dextera can feel the lightness on his own wrist now, and he knows exactly what it must feel like on guren’s. it’s like a bond, all the better because dextera still has one that matches. ]
... [ dextera manages to smile, just a little. ] Not true.
[There's a small grin forming on Guren's face, and he steps forward just a little, testing that forced distance between them. That fondness is clear in his eyes again, a little sharper.]
If you ask me, you pull off the jacket better, too. And you won't tear it up like me.
[He laughs, though, and his steps take him past Dextera, across his room to look at that gay embroidery, and then at the chess board.]
[ dextera turns to watch him walk, but luckily, his eyes are on the bracelet instead of watching guren look at the gay embroidery. he thinks it’s nice, though—he likes the colors, and thinks nothing of the motif. ]
...heh heh.
[ he does want to play a game, and if they’re occupying themselves, then it’s easy to ignore, to forget, that they can’t touch. ]
dextera laughs again, and even without his laptop conveniently nearby, there’s no way they’re going to let each other run over time. he’s up for the challenge, needless to say.
he holds up all ten fingers—now that they’ve done ten seconds once, he’s sure guren will want to try again until he’s mastered it. ]
[He wants to see Dextera open it up, and he really wants to push himself with the ten second timer. He's sure Dextera will time him just right. The best part is, Dextera will get to admire Guren's bracelet adorned wrist as he makes moves. Isn't that fun?]
It's been a little while, but I think I've got this.
[ dextera is absolutely going to admire guren’s wrist, and he even shifts so that the jacket is resting more naturally across his shoulders. he doesn’t wear it, because he already has a coat on, but it’s fine if he uses it like a cute little cape, instead.
he nods, and without even needing to think about it, he takes his first move. already, he’s thinking several moves ahead—if only he could put those tactics to use in the real world. ]
Don't sign for me to start when I can tell it's my turn.
[Punk! But his complaint continues into his move, so it's clearly not what he's focusing on. The moves. And maybe a little of Dextera making a military jacket too cute. That's his secret.
Ten seconds. On average, he's using about 7 now. Sometimes, he takes the full ten to be sure. Other times, he knows instantly what he wants to do. It all depends on how far ahead he's thinking, how he's trying to remember Dextera's patterns in his movements, and how he's trying to apply his own techniques to it.
It's always a close match in the beginning. Towards the end, sometimes they can be close, and other times not so much, but that's the fun of it, and Guren sure is having fun. It's really like they can forget how they can't touch right now, like this.]
[ dextera loves it, when he can see guren having fun. guren always has so much on his mind—even now, especially now, with that punishment hanging over their heads, and any moment that dextera can help him forget is a moment well-spent. ]
...
[ he pushes a piece into place, and catches guren’s attention. ]
Five turns.
[ an extremely confident warning, because he’s a punk. ]
[Five turns. Five turns, he says!! Guren is almost surprised by how confident Dextera is, but he's expecting it more and more.]
Fuck you.
[The fondest fuck you there ever was, as he moves one of his pieces in the most aggressive way possible. He's trying to line up what Dextera's thinking, where he's going with this, how to cut him off, and it's exhilarating, and Dextera teasing him along the way only adds to it, of course.
Five turns. If he can even push it to losing in a different number, he'll take that as a victory.]
[ dextera always has a good time, playing chess—even with ryo, it was fun, because ryo understood the game like someone who has been studying it. though, with guren, dextera has to stay on his toes, and that unpredictability makes it more fun than ever before.
even when guren uses coarse language in dextera’s christian home, he seems amused, and when he moves his next piece, he very pointedly lowers the counter to four.
this competitive, cheeky side of dextera—guren brings it out more and more. ]
[It's like a good fight, playing chess with Dextera. It's nostalgic and new all at once, and thinking back on how far he's come is always nice. He always wants to provide a nice challenge for Dextera... but here he is, pinned, four turns of ten seconds each to go.
He pushes away the distracting thoughts of how he wants to wrestle Dextera to the ground himself after this match, regardless of the victor, because he won't be able to do that, and instead lets his hand hover over the board as he thinks.
Ten whole seconds, and he makes his move, captures one of Dextera's pieces. He's going to be using all of the seconds of Dextera's turns to think, as well, but with how used to this it all is, Guren doubts they'll be the full ten each. It's more limited.
His eyes flick back across the board to meet Dextera's, anyway, because he wants to see them.]
[ dextera has no idea that guren wants to fight him, but it’s for the best, because if he thought about that, it might distract him from this very careful plan he has laid out. he does notice guren’s eyes on him, and when he glances up to meet that gaze, his own expression is fond—even with the sharp glint of a challenge as he claims guren’s bishop.
a little more, and he’ll have his king in check, and it seems like there’s no way for guren to get out of that.
it’s fun, though, playing this to the end. guren has gotten much better with the ten second limit, and dextera thinks it won’t be long before he does manage to overpower him. the next game they play, maybe... ]
[The only problem is, the more he gets excited, the more it hurts. This energy has nowhere to go, he's getting more distracted. The room is already just Dextera and this chess board, and now, each turn he's losing, he's paying attention to his own moves less. He's given up, because if he pressed on with all of his energy, it might hurt too much to reach the end and not be able to move his hand across the board and grab at Dextera's arm, his face, anything.
His gaze gets too sharp, too heavy on Dextera, but he can't bring himself to move it away.
So, his last few turns are just long stares, and then moves that don't matter. It's a little unfortunate, but he wasn't going to be able to make it out of this, anyway. He lost, five turns from the end.]
[ dextera can’t touch guren, because guren can’t touch him, but they’ve already established that things can cross the distance just fine.
so when he moves his last piece to take guren’s king, he overshoots it, just enough to touch guren’s hand with the heel of the piece—and he smiles, not exactly apologetic, but maybe wistful for not being able to touch him properly.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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...
[ this feels like a punishment for dextera, too, as he reaches out to try to place his hands against guren’s chest. he can’t. there’s no weight stopping him, but he can see the way guren is forced to move away from his hands by whatever reverse magnetism has been laid over him as a curse.
his brow furrows, as he’s troubled by the same thing—is this permanent? ]
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It'll be okay. [It's just... touch, right? But immediately, he's realizing just how much he's been using touch. With someone who can't speak, and with someone like Guren who can't use his words for his emotions, touch had been so easy. Now what?]
I'm still here, and so are you.
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...
[ dextera nods, but he’s only somewhat comforted by guren’s reassurance. they can’t sleep next to each other, like this. it should be the furthest worry from his mind, but it’s something that occurs to him anyway. ]
Try. [ he signs, stubbornly, but even he doesn’t seem to believe that trying is going to get them there. ]
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[
oh my god does he tryHe lifts his hand again, reaching with all of his might for Dextera's arm. Pushing, straining, and as he applies more strength and his feet dig in to the floor, curse marks even begin to creep along his cheek, all for nothing.
He grunts out at the effort, giving up when he's given it his all and catching his breath for a very short moment.]
I can't. I'll try every day, but I don't know when this is going to go away, if at all.
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he tries to lean forward, to rest his head on guren’s chest, something habitual and mindless until he stumbles because there’s a space between them that shouldn’t exist. ]
...
[ his head still lowered, like he doesn’t want to see guren’s face after that misstep, he exhales. ]
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Hey...
[But his hand is trying to reach, and he realizes with a click of his tongue that it's not going to work, and drops it again. What can he do... A quick few more seconds of thinking, and he's reaching to his own chest, unbuttoning his jacket.]
Come here, just a little closer.
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...?
[ he does move closer, though, just enough that it’s obvious he listened, and he glances up at guren without lifting his head too much.
he is so sad. his big eyes? the saddest. ]
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...Until it's back to normal, you can hang onto this.
[There. Optimism. A promise, a gift...]
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[ this, he genuinely didn’t expect, and he’s lifting his head properly now as some of the sadness in his eyes gives way to surprise instead—guren’s fancy military jacket! he does associate it inexorably with guren, for obvious reasons, and having it around his shoulders is thus a comfort.
he tightens it, and he nods, but... something...
he wants to give guren something too, but he doesn’t know what. it’s not right that guren should be the one to comfort him when this is, after all, guren’s punishment.
so once he’s sure the jacket is balanced on his shoulders, he unhooks one of the bright red bracelets around his wrists, and offers it out to guren urgently.
take it! ]
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A trade, huh?
[He lets out a short laugh, rolling up his right sleeve just enough and then hooking it on. At least it's for his wrist, that fits fine. He rolls up his other sleeve just to match.]
It doesn't look as good on me. [Jokes will lighten anything]
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... [ dextera manages to smile, just a little. ] Not true.
[ you look sexy in red, guren ]
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[There's a small grin forming on Guren's face, and he steps forward just a little, testing that forced distance between them. That fondness is clear in his eyes again, a little sharper.]
If you ask me, you pull off the jacket better, too. And you won't tear it up like me.
[He laughs, though, and his steps take him past Dextera, across his room to look at that gay embroidery, and then at the chess board.]
Want to play a game?
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...heh heh.
[ he does want to play a game, and if they’re occupying themselves, then it’s easy to ignore, to forget, that they can’t touch. ]
Good luck.
[ there has never been a sassier pair of hands ]
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I'm gonna wipe that smug little smile off your face. Come on. Let's do it timed again.
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dextera laughs again, and even without his laptop conveniently nearby, there’s no way they’re going to let each other run over time. he’s up for the challenge, needless to say.
he holds up all ten fingers—now that they’ve done ten seconds once, he’s sure guren will want to try again until he’s mastered it. ]
...?
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[He wants to see Dextera open it up, and he really wants to push himself with the ten second timer. He's sure Dextera will time him just right. The best part is, Dextera will get to admire Guren's bracelet adorned wrist as he makes moves. Isn't that fun?]
It's been a little while, but I think I've got this.
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he nods, and without even needing to think about it, he takes his first move. already, he’s thinking several moves ahead—if only he could put those tactics to use in the real world. ]
Go ahead.
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[Punk! But his complaint continues into his move, so it's clearly not what he's focusing on. The moves. And maybe a little of Dextera making a military jacket too cute. That's his secret.
Ten seconds. On average, he's using about 7 now. Sometimes, he takes the full ten to be sure. Other times, he knows instantly what he wants to do. It all depends on how far ahead he's thinking, how he's trying to remember Dextera's patterns in his movements, and how he's trying to apply his own techniques to it.
It's always a close match in the beginning. Towards the end, sometimes they can be close, and other times not so much, but that's the fun of it, and Guren sure is having fun. It's really like they can forget how they can't touch right now, like this.]
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...
[ he pushes a piece into place, and catches guren’s attention. ]
Five turns.
[ an extremely confident warning, because he’s a punk. ]
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Fuck you.
[The fondest fuck you there ever was, as he moves one of his pieces in the most aggressive way possible. He's trying to line up what Dextera's thinking, where he's going with this, how to cut him off, and it's exhilarating, and Dextera teasing him along the way only adds to it, of course.
Five turns. If he can even push it to losing in a different number, he'll take that as a victory.]
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even when guren uses coarse language in dextera’s christian home, he seems amused, and when he moves his next piece, he very pointedly lowers the counter to four.
this competitive, cheeky side of dextera—guren brings it out more and more. ]
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He pushes away the distracting thoughts of how he wants to wrestle Dextera to the ground himself after this match, regardless of the victor, because he won't be able to do that, and instead lets his hand hover over the board as he thinks.
Ten whole seconds, and he makes his move, captures one of Dextera's pieces. He's going to be using all of the seconds of Dextera's turns to think, as well, but with how used to this it all is, Guren doubts they'll be the full ten each. It's more limited.
His eyes flick back across the board to meet Dextera's, anyway, because he wants to see them.]
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a little more, and he’ll have his king in check, and it seems like there’s no way for guren to get out of that.
it’s fun, though, playing this to the end. guren has gotten much better with the ten second limit, and dextera thinks it won’t be long before he does manage to overpower him. the next game they play, maybe... ]
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His gaze gets too sharp, too heavy on Dextera, but he can't bring himself to move it away.
So, his last few turns are just long stares, and then moves that don't matter. It's a little unfortunate, but he wasn't going to be able to make it out of this, anyway. He lost, five turns from the end.]
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so when he moves his last piece to take guren’s king, he overshoots it, just enough to touch guren’s hand with the heel of the piece—and he smiles, not exactly apologetic, but maybe wistful for not being able to touch him properly.
of course, that’s checkmate. ]
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